What is Post-Abortion Syndrome?
Post-Abortion Syndrome (PAS) is a type of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder. It occurs when a woman is unable to work through her emotional responses due to the trauma of an abortion.
Why does abortion cause distress?
Woman are often surprised to find that abortion can be a traumatic experience. Generally, women are not encouraged to share their responses to the abortion. Often it is kept a secret and a woman is left alone with her feelings. The grief a woman may experience after an abortion is seldom recognized and is often repressed or denied. Post-Abortion Syndrome occurs when the grieving process is not completed. Our society is just now beginning to recognize the need to grieve a miscarriage, but because abortion is considered a voluntary act, a women’s grief after an abortion is not understood or supported.
When do the symptoms of PAS occur?
Some women experience PAS symptoms within months of the abortion. For others, the crisis occurs two to five years after the abortion — at the time the normal grieving process would have been completed. Sometimes women don’t experience PAS symptoms for 10, 20, or 30 years because they are unable to deal with the deep emotions caused by the abortion.
What are common symptoms of Post-Abortion Syndrome?
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How can a woman recover from PAS?
A woman who is experiencing PAS needs to complete the natural grieving
process. This can be done in individual counseling, group therapy, or in a resident
counseling center.
Who can I contact for help?
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(314) 449-7672 (800) 5WE-CARE
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Links to Post-Abortion resources…
Safe Haven, A Place for Healing from the Trauma of Abortion
additionally, i’d like to add the following links:
http://www.ramahinternational.org
http://www.helpafterabortion.com
in my view, this is the achilles heel of the abortion lie – once people recognize that abortion not only kills a baby, but is NOT pro-woman, and that abortionists lie to women and/or withhold the truth from them, once they recognize that there are serious complications that can result – spiritual, emotional, physical – i believe there will be an awakening in
America.
let it begin, please, with the Church.
wake up Christians! would you speak out if there was a killing center next to your church?
Nowadays, it is mostly young women who have abortions. Their personality is not mature yet, their psyche is not ready to realize the fact… so I see the solution in preventing abortions soever!there should be special establishments aimed to preventing abortions. PREVENTION IS BETTER THAN CURE!
I had an abortion when I was 17 years old. I deeply, deeply regret the decision that I made. My mother didn’t offer any support, she didn’t tell me that I had options, in fact she wouldn’t even let me talk about it at all. I’m now 37 years old and am unable to forgive myself. My health has been poor ever since the abortion and I feel that I somehow deserve it. I am a Christian now, and know that God truly has forgiven me. But I can’t seem to forgive myself. It’s just such a horrible thing to have to live with and I wished that I could go back and do things differently.
meg
if there is anything i can do to help, please contact me directly at boynhisguitar@hotmail.com
also, you may want to go to one of the following sites:
http://www.ramahinternational.org
http://www.afterabortion.org
http://www.helpafterabortion.com
http://www.rachelsvineyard.org
God bless you – hang in there.
Hello, Meg:
Please forgive the “lateness of the hour” in responding to your post. I didn’t realize there were messages on this page of the ORW site, so I didn’t access it until now.
I, too, am a post-abortive woman. I was virtually the same age as yourself when this catastrophic event took place, so I certainly relate to your emotions and your pain. I too am struggling with post abortion syndrome, and I know all too well how inept our society is at dealing with this singular situation. Harboring sadness and regret is one thing – beating oneself up with guilt is another.
Listen to me now, Meg – and listen as you’ve never listened to anyone before.
You need to stop blaming yourself – immediately. If the need to do so persists – stop anyway. Listen to me for a few moments, and then pick up the phone and call a compassionate counselor. Preferably, a Crisis Pregnancy Center, Abortion Alternatives hotline or anyone qualified to deal with PAS. I must also caution you that not everyone, even a clergyman, is sufficiently skilled to speak knowledgeably about this situation. If you meet with a licensed psychologist and/or minister, be clear at the outset about your necessities. I’ve learned – the hard way – that the post-abortive woman should probably state, “I am dealing with PAS – if you have a problem with that or are endowed with intellectual snobbery about this matter, please tell me now – so that I may find another counselor.”
You state that you know that God has forgiven you. I, too, knew that Jesus had forgiven me – long before I ever converted to Catholicism (I have since left the Church). I believed in this forgiveness – devoutly. Why are you unable to forgive yourself, Meg? God is greater than all of us in our totality – even in the fullness of our fated, flawed humanity. If He can forgive (and He does), we should also forgive – especially when we were so young!
I don’t know about you, but when I look back at my naivete, my unsophisticated nature, and my gullibility, I wonder if somewhere along the line, I wasn’t cryogenically frozen, another brain imbedded in my skull, and my former thinking cap transplanted in Forrest Gump’s younger sister. It was that bad, Meg.
I would urge you to consider, as I have, the following mitigating factors. (Incidentally, these are factors which even my priest took into consideration.) Did you have adequate support – either from parental figures and/or your boyfriend? I’d venture to say no – and neither did I.
Were you acting in a spirit of violence? Did you say to yourself, “I know I am causing destruction, but I don’t care?” You will never cause me to believe that you did so – and neither did I. Not by the longest shot.
Personal culpability and objective morality of an act are two different things, Meg – and they’re not always easy to reconcile. But in our cases, given our youth and circumstances, the disparity between personal guilt and the overall morality of abortion is quite marked.
You’ve been dealing with this grief for 20 years – and that’s far too long. Walk away from the computer now – and get some help from someone who cares. Someone who exercises a fair degree of compassion, eloquence and restraint in their verbiage.
And, let us remember what Pope John Paul has stated to post-abortive women (and please note that he speaks to ALL women – not just Catholics): “Let not your hearts be troubled about your unborn children, for they are residing with the Lord.”
I know it’s difficult, Meg. But you must get the help you need and STOP blaming yourself. Stop it – now. Be responsible, yes. Guilt-ridden – no. Speaking for myself, it’s the only way I’ve been able to survive the hollow echos of my own abortion – something that seemed to provide such relief at the time – and proved so illusory after the decades passed.
Ron: Could you please forward the above message to Meg? I’m concerned that, after so much time has passed, that she may not be still accessing this web page. Thank you.
annette
thanks for a very thoughtful and empathetic reply.
i pray God will continue to use you to reach others for Him.
I had an abortion, despite wanting to keep the baby. Why? Because I had health problems, an abusive husband and there were no social benefits. I attempted to call several right to life organizations in hopes that they could offer some type of sustenance. A used crib and sack of clothes was the offer.
I’m pro-choice. I wasn’t as a youth, I had no idea then about the struggle for survival. As a woman living in an individualistic society, I know the realities of raising a child while trying to provide sustenance on my own. I find it really abhorent that the most anti-abortion sentiments come from those who consistently vote against social benefits. The SAME social benefits needed for a child to be born.
I’m not saying this out of malice, I’m saying this as someone who wants the opposing side to think about how they could realize their goal: Be more pro-active about HELPING women and their unborn rather than focus on the shock-value/guilt tripping. Aide is needed more than a theological sermon.
So in closing, before telling someone why they should not abort, perhaps you should ask yourself how you can help them in a tangible manner to realize the same goal you have: to bring forth the child.
charlotte
it is truly sad that because of a lack of information, you have made life or death decisions that seem to you now as having been ‘good’ or ‘right’. i would venture to say that you did not make much of an effort to seek help, because there is MASSIVE help available, exactly consistent with that which you say you sought but couldn’t find.
all it’s necessary to do is to go the phone book under ‘abortion alternatives’ (on the same page that you likely got the info about where to go for the ‘procedure’) and there are organizations listed that exist specifically to provide EXACTLY the kind of help that you were seeking. pregnancy help centers outnumber abortion mills over 3 to 1 in america, and there are several in every state, and they provide all their services free of charge. and it’s more substantial than a crib and some clothes, though that was a kind and considerate gesture that someone made to you. it’s too bad you considered it insufficient, because that was a start.
just so you understand, right to life groups exist primarily to promote and help prolife candidates win elections. they also provide literature and speakers for public events. and they all provide referrals to pregnancy help centers. the idea that you contacted “several” prolife organizations and were not given helpful information is just not possible. for one thing, there is, at most, one prolife (right to life) office per county. so whoever you contacted was more than likely just such a social service agency as you are pleading for there to be more of.
genuine prolife help was available to you in abundance. i’m sorry you weren’t able to find that help. but it’s there, and it’s there to provide everything you claim was not available.
you see, although conservatives do believe in less taxation and fewer government programs, we
do put our money where our mouths are and support the very organizations i have referred to. those organizations do tremendous life saving and positive work without a dime of government money.
government programs are invariably ineffective and wasteful.
back to the original matter though, you might have also contacted a local church – most of them would’ve gotten you in touch with a pregnancy help center and seen to it that you got some help.
please don’t criticize the prolife movement. we’re the ones who help people just like you every day. on this site there’s a link saying ‘pregnant – need help?’ and it takes you to a site that would give you all the help you would’ve needed. also, since you obviously have a computer, did you not do a search under abortion alternatives or prolife assistance or something? if you had, you would’ve had an abundance of links to organizations such as carenet, heartbeat international, birthright, etc….
my suggestion is that you contact one of them right now and talk to them about your circumstances and experience. my guess is, again, that you didn’t contact any prolife groups, though you may have thought you were doing so.
Interesting. By the way, in case you need any no prescription needed medication, I recently got my prescription needs through this site http://www.noprescriptioneeded.com/ and I have already received my no prescription needed meds. Again, awesome point.
Safe abortions save women’s lives everyday.
You have a choice if you want to have an abortion.
Think of all of your options, but know what they say here is just to scare you.
You have a choice.
I heard this website reference on the radio today.
Let me just say, I believe in God, I am a republican, and I am a catholic-
But, I do NOT agree with your website.
I am Pro-Choice because I want to save children and women’s lives.
That is all I have to say- besides you have a lot of misinformation on this website.
This place is disgusting! It is not your choice to make for women, nor mine. They deserve a choice. You deserve the nut house!
Meg,
I had an abortion in 12/13/1989.I had my procedue done here in Northeast,Philadelphia.I was involved with a married man William and to this day I have not forgotten about my little son William.I know that I am forgiven and through all of this I have found Christ and I know that one day I will be reinited with my son.
It saddens me when I see people calling us women baby killers.It is sad that they were not there for us.
I had an abortion when I was 20. I improved my understanding of my body and of conception in general and guess what? No more pregnancies! I don’t carry around guilt over this. Although I support limited access to abortion, I recognize that it shouldn’t be used as birth control. Until you guys see your theocratic dream come true and you all live in a Christian nation, you need to get real and discuss birth control that works, so that abortion rates can truly be lowered.
I had my abortion 14 years ago when I was 16. I was one of the rare cases of pregnancy from rape. While I have worked through the trauma of the rape long ago, had I been forced into carrying that child to term I would not be here anymore. I was sucidal, having nightmares, and I felt used and disgusting. Knowing I was pregnant made it all that much more difficult in trying to deal with an already painful situation. I am lucky that my mother was supportive in my decission and lucky that I was able to get the procedure I needed; that I know deep down saved my life. I am now, many years later, a mother by choice. My abortion made this possible – for had I not had it, me and my daughter would not be here. Please step back a moment and take a good hard look at some of the GOOD that can come from abortion.
Ok, I never had an abortion so I can’t commiserate with many of you. However, the mere fact that I could have had an abortion if I had needed one has always been a great comfort to me. I did have a miscarriage, however, and the doctor called it a “spontaneous abortion.” Still, not the same thing. I happen to be a Christian as well. I know that God was able to place my “child”-(really it was a fetus…I passed and retrieved it….brought it to the hospital) but my “fetus” was placed in another lioving household. Yeah, that’s right, God can take the aborted and place them in another loving home….He’s God, isn’t He??????
If I had carried my fetus to term, we both would have lived in poverty for the rest of our lives. Alone, I would never have finished my degree, never have provided any real opportunities to my child. Even with the father – an unambitous abusive man – we still would have been impoverished, and also beaten to a pulp regularly.
I read here that there is abundant support for women like me available – in the form of campaign money for pro-life candidates, that is. In the form of speeches and propoganda, rallies and protests. We can’t eat that. We can’t hide there when we’re being raped or beaten. Tough decisions are made for practical and economic reasons, and meanwhile millions of dollars is poured into a bottlemless pit of moral outrage, where, realistically, it benefits no one.
If you hate abortion, work towards effective support for women in crisis. If you hate women like me, throw money at politicians who are powerless to effect any real change.
Janet,
You are about three decades behind the times, my dear. Today, there are many more Crisis Pregnancy Centers than there are abortion mills. All you need to do is look in your phone book under “abortion alternatives.” These places offer free services to women in crisis pregnancy including clothing, referrals. and safe places to stay if necessary. So don’t blame your situation on a lack of resources. Those resources are available to you. You just need to pick up the telephone.
And as far as “throwing money at politicians” that is a laugh. Abortionist George Tiller is one of the leading campaign contributors in the state if Kansas, FAR outspending pro-lifers out of his own pocket alone. I would say the pro-aborts outspend pro-lifers by huge margins across the country. Most pro-lifers I know invest their pro-life donations into organizations that help women and save lives.
Is there a more powerful witness against our own soul than to catch ourselves murdering our own innnocent little babies?!?!?!
Once you’ve murdered your own baby in cold blood, you’re in Hell and have not even an illusion of hope outside of the blood of Jesus Christ, who is able to save even baby murderers to the uttermost.
“If we confess our sin, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sin and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.”
As a Christian there is no way I could support a policy of “legal” abortion, but the fact that the wicked think it is legalizable has not flummoxed God nor caused Him to fall off His throne.
James
I have seriously regretted my abortion since I had it 10 years ago, soon after I joined the Navy. I didnt use a condom, I was irresponsible, having sex with someone I wasnt even in a relationship with.. who didnt care that I was pregnant. Plus, my mom just found out she had cancer. I felt like I had nowhere to turn to, I was sure I would be harassed if I had had a baby at 19.
Well, when I went to the clinic, I asked them if it was a baby, and the ultrasound lady said “No, its just a blob of tissue”. I looked at the picture on the screen (much to her dismay) and it looked kinda like just a blob of tissue. When it was time to go to the operating room, I sat down, and the doctor just started his thing, there was NO “any second thoughts?” question asked (see how not pro choice those killers are!) and I screamed NOOO!, but he said he couldnt stop. Then he gave me a shot that knocked me out, which I pretty much HAD to give oral consent to, which is the hardest part about all this, and the next thing you know, I am sitting on a chair, barely dressed, and bleeding profusely. (that man killed my baby, it seems)
For 10 years, I lived with the denial that my baby had been alive, and that I played a big part in killing it, or that I had turned my body into a gravesite. It was so hard to face up to. I even tried to kill myself 6 months afterwards, because I was in such deep depression over it.
Thanks to pro life sites like this one, (www.Abort73.com was the site that made me see the babies for the lives they really are, in the first place) I am now 100% pro life, and I have given my whole self to God, to punish if need be, or to have mercy and do with as he pleases, otherwise. I am now abstinent, divorced, and the mother to a beautiful little 7 year old boy, who I doubt will ever learn that he really could have been a little brother to someone, because of my shame and anguish.
I hope this abortion business gets done away with soon, and I pray daily for it.
Bless the little ones.
Oh yeah, and to add insult to injury, I was driven to the clinic by a pro life woman who couldnt conceive (but who, I reckon, felt she was respecting my decision). She even had to loan me the 300 dollars, which I paid her back a few days later + gas money, when I found my ATM card.
PAS is real. It hurts so many people. Plus, my mom died during my second pregnancy, anyways, so its like it was all for nothing.
Yeah I know.. stop playing the self blame game.. but who else can I blame?
I ony find solace in Gods strength. The rest of the time, whenever I think about that day, and the weeks surrounding it- I cry. I dont believe that I could possibly ever stop mourning this loss.
God has helped alot so far, though. I dont cry as much anymore, and I feel like he has finally received me with mercy. Well, probably alot of that is because I have finally received him, too.
Anyways.. I’m done posting all my issues on here, I just really think that people should know how hard it can be to deal with.
Thank you for reading. Any advice on whether I should tell my kid or not? I dont know if thats even allowed on here, but I dont want my son to have PAS too, after all, isnt PAS, generally considered grieving the death of an unborn baby you killed? Surely it must effect other household members, too. I dont want my son to distrust me, either.. I guess Im kinda freaking out about it… Well thanks- if you respond. XXXOOO
When I was 18 my boyfriend and his mother convinced me to have an abortion. When I was on the table I changed my mind and told them to wait. The doctor and nurse physically restrained me on the table and would not let me sit up. I tried to tell them many times to please wait, but they would not. I could never tell anyone about it, it was so horrible. That was 16 years ago. I will never get over it. I think what they did was illegal. I remember going into the clinic their were protestors trying to stop me and get me to come over to them. A man came out to escort me in. I wanted to run over to them, but the man took my arm and led me into the clinic. Don’t give up because i know there are other girls out there who want to run over to you…I sure wish I could have…
My child was murdered 21 months ago by my now ex wife. I have tried and tried but cant “get over it”, as my “friends” tell me i should. I have two sons with my ex, so being out of touch with her is not an option. But everytime I see her or speak to her, the first picture in my minds eye is a picture of my murdered daughter/son.
I have visited PAS support groups, but am generally shunned for a) being male and b) being strongly pro life.
Does anyone know of a resource for someone like me?
Help is available to anyone suffering from the aftermath of an abortion.
Visit http://freemetolive.com to discover free downloads, a free 30 day distance learning recovery course complete with an interactive memorial service for the unborn; many downloads of tools to assist with your recovery and access to other helpful email series like Who Am I In Christ? and Why Can’t I Forgive Myself? This course is gender neutral so that it works for the men of abortion just as it does for the women of abortion. Sin is in. Pain is pain. The hope that Jesus offers is not a respecter of gender nor issue. This course helps those who have had an abortion, suffered rape, incest, sexual, emotional, verbal, religious, or physical abuse and even ritualized abuse. Start your journey to freedom today. http://freemetolive.com
I had an abortion in May 2006, and have suffered great emotional pain, and also serious health issues from the abortion.
I am 26 years old, and was told by my doctors that due to my health and medication…fetal abnormalities would be likely. The procedure was done without medical release from my doctor and the most awful experience I have ever had.
I am now facing a full hysterectomy, and recently found that I have a tumor in my uterus. I have had numerous pelvic infections caused by this horrible procedure, hospitalized…and it gets worse every day.
I pray that someone will read this and understand that abortion providers LIE to you, it is NOT painless, SAFE or easy!I live with the fact that I chose to end my own unborn child’s life every minute of every day….
God Bless you all, and I truly hope that my experience can change the mind of another woman contemplating abortion….
I took the morning after pill a few months ago and have regretted it ever since. I am prolife and did not understand the potential of this drug to cause abortion. Anyone know how to help or had similar experiences?
I had an abortion in april 06, and I can’t seem to forgive myself for it. I can’t talk to anyone about it. I’m not comfortable talking to strangers;the only one in my life that would not say “I told you so” is the one who lent me the money, and I know she will blame herself if she knows that I regret it now. So forgive me if I run on a bit here… since I’m not actually “talking”
I am a little tired of people saying to pro- lifers “you can say that now, but wait until YOU have the choice to make” Well, I was pro- life b4 and yes when faced with the choice, I caved. Now I can say with all honesty and from experience that I will NEVER kill another of my children. The reasons at the time seemed valid to me, but they can’t have been all that valid if I still feel like this.
Choice? It’s a child’s choice to touch the stove or not after all it is his/ her hand that will get burned. We still stop them though because we know how much it hurts. It is a person’s choice to kill themselves or not, we still stop them because there is always a better way. It’s not only because they deprive themselves of life, but also because we lose them in our lives.
It is a woman’s choice to kill her child? Of course it is, but there are people who will be hurt by the lose of that child. For the most part, that is the mother included even if she doesn’t think so at the time. It may not hit at first, but it will eventually.
I would have been due 2 weeks from today. I don’t think about it often, but when I do it hurts worse than anything I ever imagined. Keep that in mind when you council someone to have an abortion. There is no way to tell before hand which ones are going to be ok with it. Why risk it?
All these women who are “pro-choice” and have had abortions state above that if they had given life to their babies and not aborted them they would be poor, and suicidal and have terrible lives. How will they ever know? they will never know if they could have had happy fulfilling lives with their children. I have friends who had unplanned pregnancies and chose life for their babies and their lives are happy, nor are these women destitute. And their children are thrilled to be alive. Women that have abortions and claim its good they did it or they’d be poor tell themselves that to alleviate the guilt they feel in their hearts.
women are not stupid. We know whats growing in our bodies…we are connected to our children. We know our babies are sheltered in us, not blobs of tissue. But when women feel abortion is their only option its heartbreaking to give voice to what we know in our hearts..abortion kills a living child.
God does not take the souls of aborted infants and place them in loving homes as one woman said. That would be reincarnation. Read your Bible. The Bible says “it is appointed unto man ONCE to die” we get one life. Thats what makes life so precious!
Also to Thomas who says this site is disgusting and gushes about women’s choice. i think you’re disgusting. What kind of choice are men like you offering my sex? Wow! thankyou! You get to impregnate us and then we get to have our bodies forcibly entered and our children ripped out of our wombs. What an AWESOME CHOICE. i feel so empowered right now.
We put men on the moon and yet we can’t offer women any other alternative to an unplanned pregnancy than deadly SURGERY. Feminism is a joke! and it makes me really angry that women feel this is their only choice, or worse, are duped into thinking abortion is a COMFORTING PRIVILEGE. I wish women would demand more for themselves than this.
ps THERE is NEVER EVER any GOOD to come from a deceased baby that never had a chance and a broken heart of mom! adoption[responding to mom that said she would have been in a abusive situation]wouuld have been one way out of many. how about divorce? OR YOU leave with baby-it was yours
to all of you women that want forgiveness for your abortions please know that God does forgive. Maybe you were meant to be a voice NOW for the unborn. turn something good out of something awful.AND above all try to forgive yourselves
Feminists like Gloria Steinem and Eleanor Smeal AND Whoopie Goldberg can “Stick It” as far as I’m concerned!!!
doing life for that awful choice I made 12 years ago.
I was married, in my 20′s, college educated and my husband was about to graduate from law school with a good job. But I was ashamed of being pregnant nonetheless…and afraid of sacrificing my own ambitions, afraid of losing my good looks, and afraid of ending up in the poorhouse because I thought babies were too expensive to care for. How is that for selfish?
I was pro-life and raised fundamentalist Christian. How’s that for turning your back on your heritage, your family, yourself, and above all your Savior? Unbelievable. I was the good, smart girl. Too smart to get pregnant unless I planned it, too proud to accept it, and too lacking in faith to do the right thing.
I know I am forgiven. Trust me, I’ve asked.
But I just realized the other night that for many years I rationalized my choice by thinking (1)my marriage has turned out so well because we didn’t have the stress of a baby early on….(2)our finances turned out better, (3)I obtained a post-graduate degree, and traveled etc….
Rationalizing the choice only mired me in the sin. So did blaming my upbringing or society…the easy availability of abortion. I was not fully realizing the horror of what I did and that what I did was WRONG WRONG WRONG no matter what the reason (or lack thereof) and no matter what I did/do to make it right.
Now that I have asked the Lord for forgiveness after realizing NOTHING can justify my abortion and NO good came of my abortion AT ALL, I feel more fully forgiven (if that’s possible). I am horrified still, but my horror makes the glory of the grace of Christ all the more brilliant and powerful (if THAT’s possible).
But I cannot forget what I did….how sinful and disgusting.
I remember being in the clinic waiting room and thinking I could just walk out right then and there and save my baby’s life… and I didn’t. I remember walking down the hall to the first room and thinking I could still walk out… but I didn’t. I remember walking to the procedure room and telling myself to turn and run and be a hero. But I was no hero. I wanted to be a hero, but I was a coward. Thousands of times I have said in my mind to my unborn baby, “I wish I could have been your hero.”
“I wish I could’ve been your hero.”
The Lord has blessed me with a three year old and 1 year old boy and girl. What a gracious Savior. My gratitude could fill the heavens. I never longed for babies/children and had no idea how much I would love my babies.
Now I am even more sickened when I look back. Sometimes I search the faces of my little ones for a glimpse of the face I never saw. I mostly look into their eyes. I try not to look back, I try not to look down and search the innocent eyes, I try instead to look up to my merciful Savior. I know he has my baby and one glorious day, I’ll look into her (I’m pretty sure she was a girl) little face and say, “I wish I was your hero.” Then the true Hero will dry our tears and all this hideous pain and sorrow will be forgotten. Hallelujah!
I was forced into an abortion by my parents when I was 17. I was adopted and the idea of abortion was so abhorent to me that I cannot describe it, but my parents threatened to leave me and after being abandoned by my birth mother I could not stand losing my adoptive parents. They kept me up at night. They argued over and over again. My father blamed my mother’s depression on me. I gave in. Despite all of this it was my will that gave in to theirs and my sin and my “choice.” I still suffer from serious post traumatic conditions that have left me on several medications for depression and angiety. I have been through a Christian group (PACE) and that was the one thing that has helped, but only to the point of being able to live with it and be there for the children I have now. All my friends that have had abortions (despite my counsel) have had PAS and the abortions were not their “choice” but were also emotionally blackmailed by men in their lives. My only hope is that the anti-abortion movement will reach out to those in other religions and make it unacceptable in all faiths. I am anti-abortion and Wiccan. I would love to help but have been rebuffed becuase I will not convert and was told by those in my PACE group that they would never accept help from Jewish or Muslim anti-abortion activists. It should come down to the children in need and not our differences.
Please consider this, I am filled with faith and it sustains me as it does you. We are not so different
Blessed Be,
Brook
May we respectfully submit our website of abortion recovery counselors around the globe. Click on us to find recovery opportunities in your area:
http://www.abortionrecovery.org
I understand the need for abortions to be legal within the US. More harm is done without the medical staff on hand. Obviously not everyone in America stands by the same opinion but that is the benefit and beauty of America. I am a believer in God and family values but I won’t go against commen sense. It’s apart of our society and if you agree or not it’s the only way to keep women safe. Never JUDGE them. For you have never walked in thier shoes. Please, adopt more children. Thank you.
It’s really no wonder that abortion can be such a traumatic experience, what with protesters outside every clinic calling women who are seeking reliable healthcare “babykillers”. It’s no wonder women are “not encouraged to share their responses about abortion”– if a woman admits to having had one, pro lifers regard her as a murderer! Can you blame us?
Symptoms of Post Partum Depression:
Anxiety
Regret / Guilt
Sadness / Sorrow
Feelings of loss
Repeat abortions
Desire for secrecy about abortion
Emotional pain
Nightmares
Anger / Rage
Suicidal impulses
Self destructive behavior
Drug and alcohol abuse
Inability to sustain an intimate relationship
Symptoms of Depression after giving up a baby for adoption:
Anxiety
Regret / Guilt
Sadness / Sorrow
Feelings of loss
Repeat abortions
Desire for secrecy about abortion
Emotional pain
Nightmares
Anger / Rage
Suicidal impulses
Self destructive behavior
Drug and alcohol abuse
Inability to sustain an intimate relationship
It isnt limited to abortion when a woman feels this things so why act like its just abortion that causes it.
Mike,
the point is that ABSOLUTELY no one was recognizing it exists! People are just beginning to understand Post Partum Depression.
If people are telling young ladies they can avoid ruining their bodies and their mental health by aborting, it is all lies. Abortionists say it can be quick easy and painless when it is by no means quick, it can last years, especially when a woman realizes that baby is gone forever without ever having the chance to fill it’s lungs with a breath of air.
When keeping a child they see the child living and breathing. When giving he/she up for adoption they at least know that child will be taken care of and maybe one day the child will seek them out.
Abortion is an emotional mental scar that may or may not ever heal.
3 points i want to make.
1. Did i miss the time that God came down to earth and told all of you that abortions are bad? I mean do you honestly think God would rather have someone give birth to a baby as a teenager and then not to be able to continue their education, get a decent job and live a decent life? Because without an abortion, you are condeming someone who might have made a simple mistake( maybe they were drinking or some other simple activity that 9 times out of 10 doesnt cause harm) to a life full of hardship.
2. How does it conncern you what someone you dont even know decides not to have a baby. That is like me telling you you cant kill a cow to eat because it is also alive. A fetus isnt really alive till it comes out of the womb and is born. The fetus doesnt have the ability to think, therefore I dont think it really cares what happens to it
3. I like babies and i have kids of my own, but if you like babies so much, why dont you women on this site just keep getting pregnant?
3 points i want to make.
1. Did i miss the time that God came down to earth and told all of you that abortions are bad? I mean do you honestly think God would rather have someone give birth to a baby as a teenager and then not to be able to continue their education, get a decent job and live a decent life? Because without an abortion, you are condeming someone who might have made a simple mistake( maybe they were drinking or some other simple activity that 9 times out of 10 doesnt cause harm) to a life full of hardship.
2. How does it conncern you what someone you dont even know decides not to have a baby. That is like me telling you you cant kill a cow to eat because it is also alive. A fetus isnt really alive till it comes out of the womb and is born. The fetus doesnt have the ability to think, therefore I dont think it really cares what happens to it
3. I like babies and i have kids of my own, but if you like babies so much, why dont you women on this site just keep getting pregnant?
please respond to me with your thoughts at raguilera36@yahoo.com
you people need to grow a pair and get over the whole abortion deal, if it isnt your baby its not your buisness.
Miguel,
1.) Murder is what God came down and told us not to do. Aborting a living BABY inside what is suppose to be the safest place for a human being in their most fragile state is MURDER.
A girl condemns herself by opening her legs in the first place. Sex is an adult responsibility with adult consequences, if a girl thinks she is grown enough to have sex, than she must deal with the consequences of carrying a BABY to term and either keep it or give it up to a loving family. Adoption allows teenage girls to keep their future open to them in obtaining a decent life.
2.) In the womb is the most defenseless beginnings of live, it has been proven that “fetuses” (as you so lovingly call them, or what I like to call a “BABY”) practice breathing by breathing in amniotic fluid, they also have awake and sleep cycles that they have brain activity and REM sleep! So how can you say a baby can’t think? Are you really that obtuse? It concerns everyone if unborn babies are facing mass genocide simply because someone refuses to take proper precautions not to concieve, abortion is being used recklessly as a “Birth Control.”
3.) We love babies too, and have many ourselves, its those who are having abortions we are trying to reach.
You obviously don’t have a “pair” as your wife keeps your locked up and tells you that you can only have sex if you agree with every liberl inane thing she says.
HaHa, men are such pathetic losers when it comes to abortion issues!
While everyone is entitled to express their opinion, some opinions reflect immaturity, self-centredness, and a chilling lack of love for the most adorable of creatures – the human baby!
What has got into people?
How can anyone ever excuse abortion?
Almost every excuse is weak!
People grow up!
Take responsibility for your actions!
What are you doing having sex before you are educated?
God said, “If you love me, you will obey me.”
He commanded us to wait for marriage before having sex.
DO NOT SELFISHLY SLEEP AROUND BECAUSE OF LUST – AND DO NOT USE THAT AS AN EXCUSE TO CRUELLY MURDER YOUR BABY!
It seems like a common theme in most of the stories of women that truly regret their abortions is that they felt they were not given a CHOICE.
Hmm, strange how it would be terrible for those women to be forced into a reproductive decision yet not terrible for the woman that actually want to abort and are forced into giving birth. Oh wait, it is terrible for them as well.
If PAS is indeed a real thing along the lines of postpartum depression, then I am all for more information about it being spread and true help being offered to these women. But I think using it as an argument against abortion is kind of ridiculous since, um yeah, postpartum depression and psychosis exist and the cases of PPD exist in rather large numbers.
And all these arguments about whether or not an embryo or fetus is a living human being make little difference to me. My issue is, if it is alive, when is it OK for a living being (the fetus/embryo/”BABY”) to use another’s body (the woman’s body) against their will? If it saves a life? Where do you draw the line when it comes to things like live organ donations? Is it simply the fact that you hate the idea of women having sex for pleasure SO much that you think they deserve everything they get? If yes, then it really doesn’t seem to be about “life” at all and your sex life must be truly unpleasant, male or female.
Now for the personal story time, I have had an abortion and I have given birth. I can assure you the more miserable (and by that, I mean it was one of the top three most horrible, traumatic events of my life) of the two in my experience was carrying the pregnancy to term, giving birth, and dealing with postpartum depression, but I do not regret either choice because they were just that: choices. Made by me. Now if someone had coerced me into making a decision they wanted me to make in either situation, I can imagine it being emotionally difficult, to say the least.
I had an abortion recently and have no regrets. I feel at peach with myself because I made the right decision for me and any children that I will have in the future. This site states it is pro-life, but what about the lives of the mothers and fathers? They are the ones who will be taking care of the children and will be dealing with all the difficulties of raising a child. They should have right to decide when to have a child. People can say they will help but parents are often on their own and are the ones who have to go through the experience.
I can understand the values of this site but I do not think that any one has the right to make or force choices on others based on a belief that may not be shared.
post abortion syndrome is God’s way of pricking your heart. if you are not saved by the grace of God you will burn in eternal hell fire because we are all sinners and we can not save our selfs “for ALL have sinned and come short of the glory of God” it is disturbing how some people can burn their concience so much that a murder that they commited doesn’t bother them. they will recive their du reward in hell someday if they do not recive Jesus Christ as their personal savior and they WILL remember that baby… they will have eternety to remember them…
Thanks 4 posting this :)
i would think that if you have had an abortion and have absolutely no regrets that either the event is too new to have ‘sunken in’, or you have lied about the experience just to make a political statement on this website, or somehow your heart is so hardened to not feel anything anymore–which i find the truly frightening alternative. There is no way one can participate in death and in such a traumatic medical procedure and not have lasting effects and still be a part of the human race.
I have read through all of these and find the post-abortive regrets to be the most honest of the posts and the most painful, my prayers and daily rosary are for all of you. I would also suggest Rachel’s Vineyard for all of you are so wallowing in pain that can’t seem to be relieved. I’m not sure of the website, but i’m sure it could be easily found through google.
We all have to remember that it is a life, not a choice, or a convenience or a decision, but a LIFE, No DECISION is necessary because it has already been determined.
The rest is only a morality of convenience, not truth.
Remember when Mary went to visit with Elizabeth after Jesus was newly conceived within her. (Luke 1:40) Jesus was only three days old within Mary when John the Baptist lept within Elizabeth’s womb. Life begins at conception. Its very clear. As usual, the scientist meets the theologian at the top of the mountain. God Bless.